The local music scene has officially been declared “thriving” for the seventh consecutive month, according to the same 12 people who have attended every show, stood in the same spots, and clapped for every band with identical enthusiasm. The group, widely recognized by venue staff and each other, reportedly confirmed the scene’s explosive growth while greeting one another by name before doors even opened.
Despite occasional evidence such as half-filled rooms, confused bartenders, and bands asking “are we starting on time or waiting for more people,” the core dozen remains unwavering in their assessment. “It’s really blowing up right now,” said one attendee, moments before helping move chairs closer to the stage to “tighten the vibe.” Another added, “There’s just so much energy,” while being one of four people actively generating it.
Local analysts suggest the group’s impact cannot be overstated, as they are responsible for approximately 85% of visible enthusiasm, 100% of encores, and at least one person yelling “one more song” regardless of how many songs have already been played. While debate continues over the scene’s actual size, sustainability, or existence outside this circle, officials agree on one key metric: if those 12 people are there, it’s a packed house.
this was generated with the help of ChatGPT and a head full of bullshit
